Romance in Today’s World

I get daily emails from different eBook notification providers, like Freebooksy, Bookbub, and I just signed up with The Fussy Librarian, whose specificity of choices I find delightful, even down to language, level of violence and sexual content. Anyway, a choice came up for a romance novel. I’m not sure why, I thought I had excluded that option from my preferences. I don’t care for romance novels, especially what heaving piles of lust-filled, pornographically explicit crap they put out these days.  It was a book called The Curve Ball and was listed as a “BBW romance”. Obviously, I went back to that sender, I forget which of the original two it was, and updated my preferences quickly. Don’t get me wrong. I’m very happy to see that the romance industry is finally recognizing that Big Beautiful Women are attractive and lovable and desirable to members of the opposite sex. As a curvy woman of size, I “fit that demographic” as it were. I just don’t want to read about it.

But it got me thinking about all the ruckus about that other inexplicably popular 50 Shades of Grey. I was happy to see that ticket sales dropped a massive 73% in the second weekend. Apparently, a Valentine’s Day release gave it an artificially inflated boost. Maybe people (read women) are waking up and seeing that that book/movie isn’t about love or romance or even BDSM in the proper sense. It is about abuse, sexual and domestic, stalking and the exploitation by a rich and powerful man of a young innocent woman under his control. I don’t care if “Oh, but they really fall in love at the end of the books.” It takes three massive volumes of cruelty and abuse for the heroine to “fix” her hero. That just feeds into the deluded mindset of battered women everywhere who stay with and defend their abusers. It isn’t even BDSM on a proper level. As anyone with any kind of knowledge will tell you, BDSM is meant to be about trust and passion and the release of inhibitions. It has safewords, and Stop and No still mean Stop and No. And I learned all that from watching CSI.

Biblical Christianity teaches us that the wife needs to submit to her husband. It is part of her God-given responsibilities to demonstrate Christlikeness in this world. Not as a mindless slave, but as a supportive partner. And not with sullenness or snarkiness or sarcasm, but with gentleness and love. I’m not letting husbands off the hook because neither does God. He commands husbands to love their wives as their own flesh, to treat them as a weaker vessel, not because they are, but because that is how you treat a precious treasure and a one of a kind gift from the Almighty Creator of the Universe Who has promised the absolute best for His children. You don’t neglect such a gift. You don’t ignore it. Put it on a shelf and focus your attention on lesser things. Why play with plastic in the junkyard when you have a diamond at home?

Real romance blossoms when it develops over time with love and care. Romance isn’t a short term thing. That’s lust. A biochemical reaction to attraction. Purely physical, and as scientists will tell you, it fades. Of course, it takes work to keep it. Romance is like any living, breathing thing. It needs food, air, exercise.

With the modern feminist movement trying to destroy male roles as protector, defender and provider, it is upsetting God’s plan for the family and perverting the proper roles in sex and romance. They downgrade men to second-class citizens, but then where does that leave the average, non-militant woman to look for “true love”? In ever more perverse storytellings of domineering alpha males who take their ’empowerment from them. And don’t even get me started on what it has done to the men who are now idolizing power-hungry sociopaths on shows like House of Cards, Boardwalk Empire, Suits and others of that ilk, while they are still being brain-washed into lip-syncing the militant feminist agenda.

Disrupting God’s order turns romance and love into perversion, power plays and manipulation. That’s why I don’t read romance novels.

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