Our intrepid hero, The Great Stu’Ba’Toa swarmed his way across the arid desert of Fliova, determined to rescue the beautiful Priestess Amaranthajasminaurlieus. He beat back the minions of the Spider God Shuga’hai with his ever-sharpening blade, Meatnveg, forged by the greatest of blacksmiths, Gorden of Ramsey.
The Great Stu’Ba’Toa, with his mighty thews and battle prowess, awed the natives of the mountainous village of Nuzbleed, which sits in the region highest above the Coliseum of Stone Musicians. He slew the dragon, Reverb, and scattered the remains in their gardens for fertilizer.
After all of these adventures and many more, my best beloved, The Great Stu’Ba’Toa entered at last into the labyrinthine jungles of Lahs Anjulous, seeking some trace of his heart’s desire, the exquisite priestess Amaranthajasminaurelius. He bound the Scarlet Phylactery of Jawn Rahm’bo to his heroic brow and stepped forward. Using his automatic-firing crossbow that had been blessed by the god Jawnwoo to never run out of quarrels, never jam, and never need to be cocked, The Great Stu’Ba’Toa entered the den of vipers and iniquity where was held his priestess hostage. He started chewing a fresh stick of bubblegum. Priests, sycophants, and agents of deceit fell before his onslaught and his determination. His battle cry echoed in the Halls of the Holy Weird. Then, at last, in the final chamber of his searching, he found her! The Great Stu’Ba’Toa gathered his glorious, regal priestess, Amaranthanjasminaurelius into his arms and carried her all the way home.
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